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Meta: For The Future
Posted by isecore on January 22nd, 2008
Today is a painful day. But I’ve come to two realizations that I need to work on in order to stay sane and maintain my life. Actually I’ve known these before, but I’ve ignored them because I thought I was larger than they were.
I need to be more transparent and more honest. I have a tendency of bottling things up inside of me, and this fills me with even more pain in the long run. In the short run I feel better, I’m keeping up appearances but at the cost of my own harmony. It’s better if I’m more honest and more transparent. It’s a kind of self-therapy I guess.
Me and Ann-Sofie are trying to find solutions. But in the meantime, I need to be more honest and more transparent. I have too much of a tendency to close the gates, and this hurts not only myself but people around me. Shutting people out is not the solution.
This has reflected on my blog. Rather than writing about the real me, I write about shallow stuff that’s easy to digest as well as produce. But I need to start using my blog to open up. Expect more personal opinions and thoughts in the future.
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January 22nd, 2008 at 21:28
That is a good idea, it might help a bit. I hope you find a way out of the maze that is depression. I will do what I can to help you, but I guess you know this already.
January 23rd, 2008 at 15:27
Sanity is overrated. As long as you don’t eat small children or put small old ladies on fire, you need not to fear anything.
I have two “idols” when it comes to sanity: Robert Broberg and Frank Zappa. Both bordeline insane.
But I do feel with you as far as pain is concerned. It do hurt’s but it won’t kill you unless you let it. Find support where you can get it. Where and who doesn’t matter as long as you feel relief in the meeting.
And as previous commenter said, I’ll do what I can to help you. but from a geographic distance.